What To Do When You Feel Like A Hot Mess

Guys, I am telling you, I am having one of those days where I don’t know what is going on. I know you have these kinds of days too. The kind of days where you are not even sure what planet you are on, but, despite your best efforts, you can’t seem to do anything right. You feel me?

So how do you get out of these kinds of funks?

I’ll tell you one thing I know for sure. Holding onto the idea that I’m a hot mess absolutely ensures that I will continue to be a hot mess. 

You know how sometimes you can get stuck in this hot mess whirlpool for days, weeks or even months at a time? I have noticed with myself that it really isn’t because of what is happening to me, it is because I keep thinking I’m a hot mess. 

Let me show you. 

This morning, I was late getting my kids to school. They actually weren’t even late, just a little later than I’d like for them to be. According to my schedule. So I walked in my front door and saw the dirty counters in my kitchen and thought, “Man, I am just a hot mess today.” And that was it. 

I didn’t really dwell on it, but it was just kind of there, running in the background all morning. 

Then I had a client cancel their appointment, and I thought, “See, now you have all this unplanned time and you don’t know what to do. Hot Mess City.”

So I started seeing other evidence to support my Hot Mess theory. Things started popping into my head. 

-My kids are on screens way too much

-my laundry is sit-in gin my room unfolded

-I need to go finish those dishes

-on and on and on

Thus confirming to myself again that not only did I have a million things to do, but I couldn’t even prioritize what to do first, so I just sit here, in my hot messiness, doing nothing and instead watching The Great British Baking Show. This cycle could literally go on for days. 

What would have happened if I had just never let that thought take root in my head at all?

I walk in the front door, see the dirty kitchen and think, “I’m a hot mess today.” Then stop. 

I would see the kitchen and think, “yeah, that isn’t my favorite, but my dirty kitchen means nothing about me.”

And again, when the client cancels, remember it means nothing about me, or my ability to manage my time. I can look at it all clearly, without judgement or fear or resistance. I can see that having a dirty kitchen is actually a sign that I am on the right track. 

See, my kids made omelets for themselves for breakfast this morning. I spent the morning walking my daughter through the process of making fried eggs and toast for herself. That is exactly the kind of mom that I am trying to be. So of course the kitchen is a mess, because we were so focused on teaching the skills that we didn’t really get around to the cleaning up lesson. That is ok. It will come another day. 

When I look at it from that thought, I’m not a hot mess at all. I’m a mom who is teaching her kids great stuff. It was a great morning. Which leads to great, productive thoughts that fuel me throughout my day. 

So how are you going to let go of the idea that you are a hot mess? It isn’t serving you , in anyway. It is keeping you stuck. If you are having a hard time letting it go (which so many of us do, right?) then sign up for a free coaching call by clicking the button below. I can help you find a thought that is going to serve you so much better.